It's Time To Slow Down and Run
Life is hectic. I can go weeks without having enough time to reflect on who I am and what my life is all about. I had more time to do that recently while on vacation at my cabin, where I spent the days working in my garden, walking to the river to be seduced by the rhythm of the fast moving water, and reading.
One of the books I read, Frances Mayes' "Bella Tuscany," made me more thoughtful
about the need for time to slow down and reflect.
Mayes has lived in Tuscany for eight years. She writes: "I thought, and now
know, that Italians claim more time for their lives. At home in California,
time often feels like a Hula-Hoop, a ceaseless whirl on a body fixed but rocking
in place."
I often feel like that when I leave my office. As president of Melpomene Institute for the past 18 years, I still juggle many balls. I often breathe a sigh of relief as I drive home, reassured that I will achieve some sense of wholeness and contentment within the next hour.
That's because, almost without fail, I'll put a brief stop to the Hula-Hoop of my life by going for a run. I started running 27 years ago when my life was much more hectic than it is today. As a spouse, a graduate student, and the mother of three young children, I was more constrained by schedules and others demands than at any other time in my life. Frustrated by all that was expected of me, I ran out the door one night to seek some space and sanity.
Because I had never run more than a few feet in my life, the actual time I spent running was probably less than 5 minutes. But when I returned home 20 minutes later, I felt much better. In addition, our three children were in bed and their Dad was reading them a story. I may have been a slow runner, but I was a fast learner. After that I left the house for a run every night at that same time.
I have headed out for a run in every imaginable mood. Sometimes I'm smiling, remembering something good or fun that has happened during the day. I'm often trying to solve a problem. Occasionally, I'm angry or annoyed. I find fuming on a run makes it disappear more quickly. I remember one or two runs in particular where, upon returning home, I was amazed to discover I had been running significantly faster than usual.
I would be lying to report that I return home from every run refreshed, invigorated, and happy. But I do know that it almost always makes a positive difference. When I try to convince other women to become physically active I downplay the physical benefits and emphasize the mental and spiritual instead.
The other way I slow down is by spending time with my grandchildren. When my grandson, Tate, was born three and a half years ago, I vowed to work one less hour per day and to spend it with him. For the most part, I've kept my promise. Now I also have a granddaughter, Paige, age 16 months, who helps me look at life in a very different light.
One day this week, Paige and I had the morning together. While her vocabulary is small, she makes sure I know what she wants to do. First she must visit our two cats. "Cat" is one of her words, and she sings and coos it as we walk onto the porch to read books. Since Tate has been reading books on his own for a while, I'd almost forgotten how little kids want you to read the same book over and over. After 6 times of "Where's Maisy", it's finally time for another book. Then we explore the kitchen. I think I might unload the dishwasher, but Paige has other ideas. I decide the dishwasher will wait, as I watch her unload one of my cupboards onto the floor. She explores textures, shapes and noises pots can make, and when I allow myself to totally be with her, I do the same.
The garden is another place of wonder for Paige. She is intrigued with the colors of flowers. She loves to smell them, but also would like to taste them, throw them in the water and pull them apart. I'm surprised when I look at my watch to see that we have spent an hour in the garden, an hour that could be seen as doing nothing. There is a feeling that I've accomplished little, but that's all in the measuring.
Too soon, my daughter is at the door to collect Paige. As I sit down at the computer, I am much more relaxed and able to complete the tasks that need to be done. I decide, again, that slowing down even more is an important part of my future plans.
Reprint permission granted by the Minnesota Women's Press August, 2000
www.womenspress.com
Click here to email this page to a friend.